10 – Good company benefits me immensely.
In recent years, I learned that I have to be vigilant about my friends because my friends affect me tremendously (and I likewise affect them). But, I realize now that back then I only thought about how much bad company can affect you, and how much bad company can hurt you. This year, however, I really benefited extensively from good company and saw its affect on me. Rather, this year I realized gratitude for the good company I’ve been getting blessed with. I hope that I gave them positive influence also.
9 – I am sick of hearing about 9/11.
This point is not quite a lesson, but a visceral experience. I am sick of being made to stand in the shadows or to be held to account because of 9/11 because I’m Muslim. I’m sick of the victim mentality we find in our society (whether or not related to 9/11) among (a) Muslim Americans, (b) Christian Americans, (c) Americans in general. But, the lesson here is that people quickly jump on the bandwagon of victimhood any chance they get.
8 – Sometimes in life, you don’t get closure. Rather, you must make peace with it. And move on.
Sometimes in life you need that moment that somehow gives you permission to move on. Sometimes you need a letter, or an apology, or a confession. And, if you don’t get it, stop waiting. Make peace with the situation. Make peace with its place in your heart an in your consciousness and move on. There are parts of me that still ask the air to ask certain people, “Why?” but I know I won’t get answers. Maybe some feel the same way about my choices.
7 – When you listen to teachers, your transformation takes place at 100x the speed it does when you do not have a teacher or when you do not listen to your teachers.
I’ve seen it in myself when I do and don’t listen to my teachers. I’ve seen it in my students. I’ve seen it in my students who listen and those who don’t listen. And, I’ve seen the lack of transformation among those students who break off from teachers. And, I’ve seen the lack of transformation among students who use their teachers as trophies, but do not listen. Most commonly, however, I’ve seen the lack of transformation among those who stubbornly or defensively or (mostly likely) naively insist on their independent thinking separate from teachers, not realizing that the best teachers accelerate and enhance independent thinking.
6 – Some people are pathetic.
Not much to say about this point. Sometimes we have to accept that some people will not be happy with you and will seize the moment to attack you, even if they have to lie about it. What can we say about such people, except that they are pathetic.
5 – Love generates love.
It’s that simple: love generates love. Love begets love. Sad that it took me 40 years to learn it.
4 – When you seize control of yourself and let go of controlling life, life does get much better.
Rather than trying to focus on the ominous mysteries of the future, or rather than trying to figure out God’s plan for me. I found it much more useful to seize control of my thinking, to focus on my heart and on myself, and let the chips fall where they may. And, life has been significantly better for it. My goodness, so much better.
3 – A central concern of our era is the corrosion of character and the loss of manners.
We Muslims should invest less of ourselves trying to get accepted by mainstream America with our pleasantries and claims of victimhood. We should shift the bulk of those particular efforts toward the difficult process of strengthening our character, backbone, and refined manners. From there, we have to seriously, consistently push the agenda of character in our society. At this point, it is not only our survival that matters, but the rapid collapse of general American society.
2 – Sometimes God gives ease after difficulty by making you stronger & sometimes by changing your views.
This is one of the most profound lessons I’ve learned this year. We are promised ease after difficulty, and according to some commentaries, we are promised two eases for each difficulty. I naturally assumed that those eases would come by way of difficulties – the thorns in my side – getting removed. Sometimes that happens. Or, sometimes, something better would be given that would help me forget the thorn. Rather, what happens sometimes is that the difficulty makes us much, much stronger. Then, the difficulty no longer seems like a difficulty. Sometimes the difficulty seems like ease itself. Or, in some cases, our views on our selves, life, the world, and God change, resulting in us forgetting about the difficulty.
1 – The people of our society are wounded and scared.
This point is the biggest lesson I learned in the past year. We all know that some people are wounded. Now, I assume that most or all people are wounded. Our challenge is to go through the labyrinth of possibilities and find healing for each and every person. Including some of the people above that I spoke about with displeasure.
What adds to the wounds is that ours is a hostile, hostile climate. It is hostile to our minds and hearts. There is so much visceral fear in our society that people are seriously losing their rationality. The result is even more wounds.
